Talk About Surprises!

Ian took a day off today and of course that threw off my entire schedule!  Usually, I make him some coffee and 'butter' his toasted bagel with cream cheese while he's in the shower. Then, after he's gone to work I tidy up the bathroom and bedroom before working out in the basement.  Then I shower, dress and walk the dog before heading off for my late morning classes at Queens College.  Then it's back home in time to start making dinner.  But today, he stayed home.  So he didn't take his shower, I didn't make him his coffee or toast his bagel. Instead, he made himself some eggs and bacon and had a small bowl of canned fruit cocktail. I decided not to do the bed or tidy up the bathroom.  Instead, I went on with the rest of my morning -- my workout and shower before dressing, walking the dog and going to class. When I got home, soaked from the rain, I thought Ian might be watching TV or puttering in the kitchen, but he wasn't.  I started shedding wet clothes as soon as I got inside and went upstairs to get some dry ones, but when I entered the bedroom, there he was, in all his naked glory, waiting for me, on our bed, with his legs in the air exposing his hole!  Needless to say I got naked as quickly as I could!  I don't need anyone to tell me how to respond to that kind of invitation!  He made me a real happy camper despite the rain!

Not-So-Lazy Sunday Morning

On the average Sunday, Ian and I wake up later than usual, relax a little in bed, turn on the T.V. to some home show for background noise and fool around a little before taking our shower.  Then he tidies up the bedroom while I head down to the kitchen to make brunch. By the time I get down there, T.J. has already made himself some coffee and toast and is in the living room watching cartoons.  

But this morning was different.  Instead of just lounging in bed, Ian was all hot and bothered, his beautiful cock stiff as a tree.  There was no way I was going to pass that up, so we started kissing and groping each other.  He urged me down to his cock and, taking the hint, I took him; kissing and licking and sucking that wonderful, uncut cock of his.  

From the signs, I knew that Ian did not want me to bring him all the way; that he wanted to fuck me.  So after a couple minutes of vigorous love making to his cock and balls, I let him push me back onto the bed, spread my legs and rim my ass.

I get a special tingle down my spine and into my balls when he rims me, sticking his tongue into my bunghole, especially right after waking up.  It makes me all the harder.

When he was done eating my ass, he pushed me further up the bed, pushed my legs into the air and climbed onto the bed with me. Then he put his hard cock up against my wet hole and and pushed, entering me as I moaned loudly and grabbed the sheet in my fists.  He pounded my ass with his deep thrusts.  As he pounded my ass, he bent forward and kissed me hard on the mouth, telling me how hot my ass was.  That's when I started jacking off.

Ian was covered in a sheen of sweat as he continued to fuck me, only faster and deeper. I couldn't hold out any longer and came, spraying my cum all over my neck and chest. That was enough for him.  He pulled out of me, gripped his cock and shuddered, shooting his load onto me, mingling his cum with mine.  

When he was done shooting, he lay down next to me and we cuddled, kissing, his knee gently grinding into my softening cock and his hands softly kneading and squeezing my ass.  After a few minutes, we got up, padded into the bathroom together and showered. 

In the shower, after soaping up and rinsing off, I wanted a little bit of fun, so I got down on my knees and took his soft cock into my mouth, all the while the hot water was hitting me on my back.  Before long Ian was get hard again and I soon had him breathing heavily and moaning with pleasure.  After only a few minutes, his ass tightened and legs stiffened.  I knew it was only a matter of seconds.  Still, I went down on him, swallowing him to the root. He let out a few strangled grunts.  I pulled him close to me, buried my nose in his crotch and swallowed as he came.

When he was done and getting soft, I let his cock out of my mouth, stood and kissed him, allowing him to taste his own saltiness on my tongue.  Then I stepped out of the shower and began toweling off.  He turned off the water and I handed him a towel as he stepped out of the shower.

Back in the bedroom, I put on some lounge pants and a tee-shirt and headed for the kitchen to make brunch.

On Your Knees!

As much as I love those long, deep and slow fucks Ian gives me when he's really feeling randy and fucks me first thing in the morning, What I truly love is his hot, moist mouth on my hard cock.  I especially love it when I have him on the floor looking up at me with those hungry eyes of his, salivating; it makes me even hotter for him!

Intimacy

I have had sex with quite a number of men in the twelve years since I admitted to myself that I preferred men to women.  Quite a lot of those sexual encounters were just that -- encounters; an anonymous dick through a glory hole, random meetings in a bar or the park that ended with me sucking a stranger's cock, fucking a stranger's ass or having a stranger fuck me or suck my dick.  Sometimes one of us was naked (or nearly so) but usually it was just a pair of dropped pants that were quickly hiked right back up again afterward.  And while the act of sucking someone's dick or fucking their ass may seem quite intimate, it is anything but.

Anonymous sex is narcissistic.  It's about pleasing yourself; getting your rocks off.  

When I was sucking some random guy's cock in a back room of a bar, it was all about me making him cum so I could shoot my load all over the floor or his shoes or his pants.  When I was fucking some stranger, it was about me filling his guts with my cum.  I didn't care at all if he came.  When I was getting fucked, it all about the feel of the cock in my ass and the sensation of it slipping in and out of me.  The same thing when my cock was getting sucked; it was all about the feel of the tongue and the heat of the mouth.

Intimacy does not come from being naked with another person.  I've been naked with plenty of guys.  Being naked is part of the act of sex.

Intimacy begins with the willingness to share who you are and what you love with another person.  It begins with allowing that other person to see you soul naked, not just your body.

I have been truly intimate with only a few men.  Eddie, my first lover; Toro, the man who introduced me to leather play and bondage; Ian, the man who would become my husband; and Billy, the man who shared my and Ian's bed.

Intimacy does not happen right away, it takes time and a willingness to learn about the other person in the relationship.  Ian and I are very intimate.  But we give each other space too.

Another person I am becoming intimate with is my half-brother, T.J. (and no, not in a sexual way you pervs).  It has taken us more than a year and a half to reach the level of intimacy we share.  I respect his privacy and he respects mine and Ian's.  There are rules in place in our household, but T.J. can ask me or Ian anything.  He has asked about our sex life, and I've explained as much as I was comfortable with.  He's met our friends and is comfortable around them.  We don't hold back the tuth about who we are and that has allowed me and T.J. to become very close, the way brothers should be.  Do I tell T.J. everything?  No, but who tells everyone everything?  It isn't so much keeping secrets as it is setting boundries. And T.J. understands and respects that.  And I know that he doesn't tell me everything either.  I wouldn't expect him too. 

Daddies

If any of you are long-term readers, you know I had a fairly crappy childhood that got worse when my Dad walked out on me and my Mom when I was seven years old.  He was Irish-German and had a bit of a temper, especially when he was drunk.  Thankfully he was only a yeller, not a hitter, but some of the things he said when he was drunk were very hurtful. Anyway, after he left us, Mom became a drunk seeking solice in sex with any man she could pick up and after we moved in with Grandma, she did her best to shield me from the worst of my Mom's drunken sex binges.

You might think I have mommy-issues, but I don't -- thanks in large part to my Grandma. It's my Dad I have problems with.  He's been dead now for about a year and a half and from time to time I get really angry with him, especially after learning how he cleaned up his act, settled down and became a good father to my half-brother, T.J. (not that I begrudge him any, I just wish I could have had what he had).

The one thing I do remember about my Dad was that he was a very handsome man. Twenty years ago, he was a very athletic man, part of a baseball team at this job, working out in the basement of our house, often shirtless in the summer.  I remember his big hands, his hairy chest and his beard and how he used to call me 'slugger' when he would play baseball with me in the park. I guess that's why I've always been drawn to men with chest hair or beards like the guys below.  

After I first came out, I often fantasised about doing it with a much older man.  I even got to fulfil that fantasy a couple of times -- once in Forest Part and once in the back room of a bar. 

Glory Time

There was a time, before Ian and I got serious, when I would go into Forest Hills and go to this gay bar I knew that had a back room for cruising.  It was a dimly-lit maze of flimsy plywood corridors and chain-link fencing.  Every five or six feet there were holes in the walls. There was even a small area near the back where several guys could get together and suck anonymous cock face to face; no names, no talking, just quick, sleazy sex.  That bar has been gone now for several years, replaced with a pet shop of all things!  But when I then back to those heady days of free cock, I grow hard and thank my stars I didn't get anything worse than a face full of warm, sticky jizz.